Showing posts with label IEP. Show all posts
Showing posts with label IEP. Show all posts

Thursday, April 30, 2015

The Transition to Public Special Education

Tate is having wonderful experiences at school. He likes school and that is so important. But that has not always been the case. Once upon a time, he cried almost every morning before school. School was very stressful for him. He had a lot of needs that were not being met. He could not communicate his needs. Anxiety ruled him. It was hard on him and it was hard on our whole family. Because when Tate is unhappy, we are all unhappy.

When Tate began kindergarten he had come straight out of early intervention. He began Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA therapy) before his third birthday and we aimed for forty hours a week of discrete trial. Incidental teaching was used throughout every waking minute, trying to turn his whole day into one learning experience after another. We were trying to “catch him up” to his peers and get him kindergarten ready. We did the ABA with experts in the field of autism and the price tag was huge.

I knew there might be some issues with the public school immediately. One reason being-- I had called the public school and inquired about their preschool program. I also asked about the district’s ability to provide Tate with some services for our in-home ABA therapy program. The voice on the other end of the phone told me if I had determined ABA therapy was best, I had been reading all the wrong books. I knew ABA therapy was the ONLY research-based therapy at the time. So my first impression of the special education director and the program was not good. I did not contact the school district again regarding Tate’s education until he was ready to start kindergarten. We had an IEP meeting so Tate would begin school with paraprofessional support. It was evident from our first meetings the special education providers and I were not going to agree on what an appropriate education for Tate would look like. It did not get better for a long time. I had set my expectations high and I was sorely disappointed. I was also shocked. Tate has five older siblings and I had NEVER had any complaints in the past about our children’s education. I had a lot to learn about the difference between general education and special education.

Tate at his early intervention program
I had a lot to learn about the difference between private early intervention and the public school’s special education program too. There were few similarities. When I had questions about autism or challenging behaviors while Tate was in early intervention the staff had answers. Those first few years of public education I saw little evidence the ones providing Tate’s services understood autism.

We had some unforgettable experiences those first few years of public education. When Tate was six, one day he used his pencil to pretend. He pointed it at his paraprofessional and said “pow pow.” The para mentioned this to her supervisor. That teacher took Tate to the principal’s office. She asked if the incident should be reported to the police as the school had a zero tolerance for threats. Tate was six. He has autism. He was holding a pencil. And he was made to feel like he had done something bad. In his early intervention program it would have been celebrated. Pretending! Object Substitution while pretending! This was huge! The autism expert from Tate’s early intervention program would have written me a note or called me to tell me the great news. In the public school setting he was taken to the principal. Luckily the principal was a very reasonable man. When he told me about the incident he was smiling and assured me he never even considered making that call to the police.

Tate at Kindergarten
One phrase I heard often when I made a request for a service was, “We’ve never done that before.” Social skills coaching on the playground was one of those things they’d never done before. The argument against it was that Tate needed free time on the playground to do whatever he wanted. He would have paced and stimmed. I did not want those precious teaching opportunities wasted. The consultant / advocate I brought with me to our meetings argued for the coaching. In an effort to convince me Tate did not need coaching on the playground, the school district brought in their own autism consultant. The plan was for her to observe Tate for a few hours and then give some recommendations. (My own consultant had worked with Tate for years and knew him well but they wanted someone to observe him for a few hours and make recommendations.) I asked if I could be present to hear the consultant give her recommendations when she was through with her observations. Even that was a point of contention, as some did not seem to want me present. Thankfully, the principal called me and told me when the meeting was about to convene and I lived one mile from the school so I was able to get there and hear firsthand what was said. I will never forget what I heard or the looks on faces that day. That consultant agreed Tate needed playground coaching. AND she recommended even MORE social skills coaching than I had asked for be incorporated into his school day. I smiled all the way home that day. The suggestions made by the district’s consultant were not implemented in full but I am quite certain they would have gone with her advice had she said Tate needed LESS services. No one argued with me about the playground coaching much after that. For every battle I won though, I lost two.

We fought many other battles as well. I asked for Tate to receive a warning before he was to have a substitute teacher. I understood it would not always be possible and I know sometimes people become ill right before school begins. However, if a teacher had scheduled an absence and I could give Tate a warning before he walked into a room with a stranger in charge, it made a world of difference to us at home. Tate’s anxiety level after having a substitute was often high. I asked. I begged. I demanded. This became a real problem and no matter how many times I explained the need it did not seem to matter. General education teachers would willingly tell me when they were going to be absent. But the special education staff rarely seemed to be able to get me that information. The time that mattered the most was once when Tate had a gift to give a special education teacher before the holiday break. He took it to school two days before the break only to find a substitute. The secretary told me the teacher had scheduled time to be off long before that date. He was so hurt. If the goal was to show me who was “in control” then I was shown. Often. There was nothing I could do. I saw over and over that one person could ruin Tate’s day and ruin our evening. One person.

Para professionals and I often had to communicate in secret if we had information we wanted to exchange because I was not allowed to talk to my child’s paraprofessional without their supervisor present. I know what you are thinking. It was a ridiculous rule. It was a hindrance to everyone involved, especially my kids. I was told I could not even say, “There is a Chapstick in Tate’s pocket” to the paraprofessional. The special education director could not be moved no matter how many times I appealed to her. Despite the rule, the paras and I found ways to communicate when it was in Tate’s best interest. On two separate occasions I received phone calls at home in the evening from two different substitute teachers I’d never met. Both had been subs for Tate’s para. Both wanted to tell me something that had gone on at school they felt I should know about. Both had been told they were not to talk to me. They did anyway. Not that I was able to do anything about the problems they discussed with me though.

I came away from that first experience with my district’s special education department disheartened. It has taken me years to recover and be able to fully trust my children’s IEP teams. We have wonderful teams now and are very satisfied. The differences are amazing. My faith has truly been restored.

I learned some really valuable lessons and made some valuable observations those first years.

1.     One person can make or break a child’s education. One person.
2.   When your special needs child is miserable at school, the whole family is affected.
3.   The words “Promote independence” are spoken with a smile by educators, but those words are code for “reduce services” and a parent should not be fooled. Of course everyone’s goal is for a student to become independent, parents included. But not prematurely and not to save the district money.
4.   If the school wants to amend the IEP to “promote independence” and promises the services being reduced “can always be added back in later,” it will take an act of Congress to get those services back. Parents should not allow themselves to be coerced or pressured into signing anything amending their child’s IEP to reduce services.
5.   The law says a child’s needs must be met. So, in theory if there are ten children who need XX for one hour a day and only one person who can deliver XX, working eight hours each day, the district is obligated by law to hire another XX provider. In reality what I believe happens is the children who needs the XX the most get the XX and the children who need XX the least do not get it, OR the eight hours is split between the ten children. But an additional provider of XX is probably not going to be hired. The law is often ignored but dollars carry a lot of weight.
6.   Privacy policies can be a real detriment to a child’s education and safety. Privacy policies keep substitute teachers and many others from knowing about a child’s disability, needs, behaviors, treatments…
7.   Not every educator is good at his / her job.

8.   Tenure protects bad teachers.

Thursday, March 19, 2015

Paraprofessionals: Angels Among Us

I was asked to write a post about the qualities of a good paraprofessional (para). I could hardly do that without saying a few things about the super paras Tate has known.

When you have a young child with an IEP in public school, the paraprofessional is often the person with the most influence in his life for the school day. Yet, those valuable people are paid the least, frequently taken for granted, and given almost no voice sometimes. It is an upside down world we live in. If there was a Paraprofessional Hall of fame, some of the folks I am about to tell you about would have a plaque there.

Tate and Sydney with Shelly
When Tate began school, we stepped into an ideal situation in some ways. A Kansas University student who had been working with Tate in a preschool setting needed to spend a semester in a public school setting to fulfill her graduation requirements. She applied for the job as Tate’s para and was hired. Shelly was not a traditional student. She had kids and she knew first hand what it was like to have a son with autism. Her son was older than Tate and nonverbal. Because of Shelly, the transition from Tate’s private early intervention program to public school went very well. Shelly already knew Tate’s strengths and weaknesses. She was energetic, excited, and fun. Kids were drawn to her like moths to a light. Social skills teaching opportunities abounded. If playing with Tate meant they got to be with Shelly, the kids were always willing.

In my opinion, Shelly knew far more about autism than anyone else in the school building that year but no matter how many times I asked, I was not allowed to bring her into our IEP meetings or ask for her input. The reasons are not really valid ones in my mind. There was: Paras do not have the education teachers do. And: It would violate your child’s privacy. Then: We need the para with your child during the meeting. And of course: We are not required by law to allow it. I don’t know how many times I heard about how highly qualified my son’s para was but when it was time for the IEP meeting the para was not qualified “enough” to have a voice.

Tate's wonderful Miss Grace,
2nd grade
The next Para who made a real impact for us was Miss Grace. I smile just typing her name. She made learning fun. She often went far beyond her paid duties to help make a real difference in Tate’s life. In first and second grade, Tate cried often in the morning because he did not want to go to school. A reminder that Miss Grace would be waiting for him could sometimes turn him around. Miss Grace is beautiful and Tate was enamored. She could cajole Tate into touching finger paints or clay, and doing a lot of activities he disliked. Miss Grace really got to know Tate and she genuinely liked him. She is very outgoing, taught him a lot about teasing, and she was with Tate as a coach through many of those playground interactions with his peers that his IEP called for. Grace is likely responsible for much of the social progress Tate made in the primary grades. To this day when we run into her in the community, she can engage Tate in twenty minutes of active conversation without breaking a sweat. I am his mother and I can rarely do that. Miss Grace has a gift and I will forever be grateful she shared it with us.

Tate was without para support for a while in third grade and substitutes were coming and going. One day I happened to be at the school when a new sub showed up. His name was Richie. I did not know it at the time but Mr. Richie was to become my hero. In the paragraph above, I said that I smiled when I typed Miss Grace’s name. My vision actually blurred with tears when I typed Richie’s name. Mr. Richie was everything we needed and has made a life-long impact on us. I can imagine we will still be referring to Mr. Richie when Tate is old and gray.


Mr. Richie and Tate, 3rd grade
There was a bit of an ironic beginning though. Richie is black, and Tate in his younger years had been quite racist, much to our embarrassment. Tate was not taught this by example I can assure you! Like many other irrational fears that come with autism, Tate was uneasy around “brown skinned people” in his own words. The first day Mr. Richie showed up, I walked over to the teacher to warn her Tate would likely be rude and even fearful. But thankfully, I don’t think Tate ever noticed Richie’s skin color. If he did I never heard about it from anyone. And if Tate had been rude, Richie probably quietly laughed about it, understanding that autism often causes misperceptions. Richie just “got it” from the very beginning.

Tate with Mr. Richie, 4th grade
If I were limited to two words to describe Richie, they would be: “autism whisperer.” But fortunately I can say much more. Mr. Richie was with Tate for much of third grade, all of fourth, and all of fifth grade. Mr. Richie has a huge presence but I don’t know how he does it because he is one of the quietest guys I know. He taught Tate to do things no one else was having any luck at. Mr. Richie always seemed to know what Tate was thinking. He could talk Tate down from a meltdown as well as I could have myself. Maybe better. He was firm yet kind. Academically Tate did very well with Mr. Richie at his side too. Richie was good at getting Tate to try new activities and foods. Tate wanted to please Richie because he cared about what Richie thought. THAT is huge in our world. Tate does not show much affection or appear to have much interest in many people other than family; but he connected with Mr. Richie. Mr. Richie taught Tate many social skills. That lunch buddy program I am always blogging about had a waiting list because the kids loved eating with Mr. Richie probably much more than they liked helping with Tate! (Tate's Lunch Buddy Program Described)

Several times Tate got frustrated enough with Richie to say, “You are fired!” Once was when Tate had become obsessed with his watch. He used his watch as a visual stim and would stare at his watch to see the numbers change when he should have been doing his classwork. Richie occasionally had to take the watch away from Tate. No one but Richie could have taken that watch and still gotten Tate past the meltdown and refocused on the task at hand. Autism whisperer, I’m telling you.

Team Tate is amazing
The Junior High transition had the potential to be a real nightmare but in stepped an amazing new para named Miss A. She is young, full of enthusiasm, always has a smile, and is as much a friend to Tate as she is a teacher. I do not think sixth grade would have gone half as well as it did without Miss A. This year Tate has Miss A with him part of the day but he has also graduated to rotating through Paras as he goes from class to class. There are four total and I like all four of them! More importantly, Tate likes them all and they are really good with him. 

I understand that not everyone has the experiences that our family has had with wonderful, caring paraprofessionals. I’ve heard stories from teachers and other parents, of paras who hurt or neglected their child. One teacher told me of a para who slept through parts of their day in her classroom. I hope those are the exceptions and most people are having the kinds of experiences we have had.

And that brings me to the topic I was asked to write about: What makes a good paraprofessional? Of course many of the qualities of a good para are obvious. A para needs to be kind and compassionate, enjoy children, and have a good attitude-- even when the job is messy or hard. The para must be able to teach at the grade level of the child they are helping. If a para is helping in the high school in an algebra class but cannot do algebra then no one is going to benefit. A para should be physically fit enough to stick with the child they have been assigned to work with. Tate needed social skills coaching on the playground when he was in elementary school. Tate also required para support in PE at times. His para was sometimes called on to run up and down a soccer field or play kickball. Some kids with autism have elopement issues too. A para needs to be able to keep their young charge safe.

Then there are qualities that might not be so obvious. A sense of humor will sure come in handy. It is important not to take it personally when a child with autism says what they think. Many times Tate has reported to one of the adults in his world that their skin is a bit wrinkly or they are getting up there in years. Sometimes these kids are funny! Enjoy them! I love it when I get a note from one of my kids’ teachers sharing something fun they have said or done. I will add this disclaimer, before I get messages: Of course, there is a difference between laughing about something kids say or do, and laughing at them in a mean-spirited way.

A para should not be squeamish. A person hired to work with a handicapped child should not be afraid of sticky fingers, sneezes, drool, or puddles of any other bodily fluids. A para might be called upon to teach a child to: blow their nose, comb their hair, use a fork, button, zip, tie, wipe or wash, among many other things. A para might be asked to teach using: water, sand, dirt, clay, shaving cream, paint, or many other substances.

A para may need to learn sign language, braille, or other skills just so they can work with one student. My kids’ paras have had to do some things they may have never considered when they applied for the job. Some skills might seem insignificant yet make a big difference for the child. One para has spent hours of hard work teaching my little girl to play one song on the recorder. The other students in her class were onto much harder pieces by the time my daughter mastered that first song: Hot Cross Buns. The para was probably hearing that awful whistle in her dreams at night due to all the time it took, but she was so patient. I had given up all hope of Sydney mastering that song but the para had not. I had even asked Sydney’s teacher if they could just “skip” the recorder but Sydney insisted she wanted to learn to play that recorder, just like her peers. Because of the tenacity and patience of one para, Sydney can proudly play that song. 

Students with special needs can have a lot of energy. Of course some are even hyperactive. On the other hand, students with special needs can be inactive and very slow moving. Either way a para will need to have a lot of energy. My daughter Sydney has ADHD and is hard to keep up with, while my son Tate moves at a snail’s pace. When Tate was in preschool, a teacher once told me she always had an energy drink before working one-on-one with Tate because she needed enough energy for both of them. The more fun and alive she was, the more engaged Tate would be. I’ve never forgotten that. She made a really good point. Paras need to be very engaging; no matter how hard their pupil is to engage.

Sometimes a para has to spend a lot of time taking data and doing paperwork. For many parents, the note they send home is very important and cannot be neglected. (Click here to read about that invaluable note home.) It is a parent’s link to school and helps them to know what their child is working on and how they can help. The data a para is sometimes called upon to collect may seem a waste of time but is very important in determining what kind of help the student will receive. Sometimes a para may not appreciate what is asked of them but they are required to do it anyway. A para must be able to “grin and bear it.”

Paras will be called upon to make personal sacrifices on occasion. A para might be asked to do something minor, like discontinue the use of perfumes so a child with sensory needs can be more comfortable. But bigger sacrifices are asked too. Some paras go home with bruises. There are students who exhibit self-injurious behavior and some who become violent. Paras have to be able to keep the student safe or even defend themselves without returning any aggression. And it all has to be done while staying calm.


Who are these people we ask so much of and pay so little? Who are these people who love our kids and see their potential? Who are these people who have to implement all those “great ideas” our kid’s teams think up while we are in those IEP meetings? Who are these people who keep coming back for more? They are “angels among us” and they are called paraprofessionals. They make a difference in our children's lives every day in little ways that we will never even realize. They make a big difference in our children's lives and whole family's lives in the end too. They help make our children who they become. There would never be enough money or words to reward these people the way they ought to be rewarded. 

Saturday, November 15, 2014

Tate's Lunch Buddy Program Described

Since my last post, Thank You to The Class of 2020, I have had numerous requests from people asking me to describe the lunch buddy program. The following describes Tate's lunch buddy program. Part of the beauty of a lunch buddy program is that it can be "tailored to fit" and changed as needed. 

I first heard of lunch buddies when I was at an autism conference before Tate ever began school. As soon as I heard the program described I was “sold” on the idea. I began asking for a program for Tate when he started first grade. After we discussed the lunch buddy program at a meeting and considered it for first grade, it was agreed that we would wait and begin it in second grade. There were several reasons involved. We already had several social skills “programs” in place that first year of all-day public school and they were very time-consuming for the staff. The speech teacher had launched a social skills group for Tate, pulling peers from his class two or three times a week to play games and encourage Tate to interact with his peers. We had an adult coach with Tate at recess prompting him to play with peers so he would not wander aimlessly, isolated or lost in repetitive behaviors. Tate was struggling to learn the names of his classmates so photographs of all his classmates were obtained and he practiced naming them and matching children to their names as part of his day. The school staff was working hard on so many things that the lunch buddy program was put off.

When Tate began second grade, at my insistence the lunch buddies program was added. The purpose of the lunch buddy program was for Tate to learn social skills that he could then generalize into other settings. Our hope was to teach Tate skills by coaching him and eventually fading the prompts. Let me be clear: a lunch buddy program by itself is not going to teach your child all the social skills they need to learn. It is one of many things we have done to help Tate learn social skills. The skills he has learned from the lunch buddy program have been reinforced over and over throughout his day since we began the program. Mastering skills was not something accomplished in one year. Tate has had a lunch buddy program for five years and it has taken a very long time to see a lot of results.

Buddies
The lunch buddy program has been successful, in that Tate can sit amongst friends in a lunch setting and be fairly comfortable. Tate has learned skills and the coach has been faded much of the time. Tate still has autism but he is able to handle himself and respond appropriately in so many situations now due to all this coaching. As it turns out I often hear from the parents of the typically developing children who have participated that their children have learned so much from Tate. They are thankful that their children have learned about autism and have become very comfortable around my child with special needs. Among the things these children have learned are compassion, understanding, patience and perseverance. They also have a pretty good idea about what autism is and could probably generalize what they have learned to interact with other people with special needs.

I am a firm believer that the children who participated should be told about my child’s disability. I do not believe the lunch buddy program would have been successful for us without the full-disclosure that I insisted upon. Explaining WHY Tate is different than they are and WHY Tate NEEDS so much more instruction than they do was key. Children who are educated about autism are far less likely to bully a child with autism in my opinion. I do not have statistics on this. I did what made sense to me. I insisted from first grade on that Tate’s classmates be told that Tate has autism and then given an age appropriate definition of autism. I wrote a personalized definition with illustrations in a picture book format for the kids. It started out very simply in first grade and got a little more detailed with each passing year. See the book in my post: What is Autism. When Tate was in first grade I wrote a note to parents that went home in the first graders’ backpacks, explaining autism and letting them know their child had a classmate with autism. I wanted to take the mystery out of the reasons that Tate was followed around by a Para-Professional throughout his day. I wanted parents to be ready with an answer if--and when--their child came home and asked questions about Tate.

The lunch buddy program has evolved a lot over the years. We learned what worked and what did not and tweaked it as we went. In grade school there were parent permission slips that had to be signed so the students could participate. Tate’s whole class wanted to be involved and got those permission slips back quickly. The kids LOVED teaching Tate. When we began, in second grade it started with one teacher or Para-Professional sitting with Tate amongst several of his peers. His peers were coached before lunch some on how to try to involve Tate in their conversations. Tate was very hard to engage back then. He would talk to adults but not children easily. The kids would ask him questions they had rehearsed with a teacher in a short meeting. A peer might ask Tate, “Do you have pets?” Tate would answer, “Yes”. The adult would maybe have to whisper to Tate and tell him what to say next. So Tate might be coached to say, “I have a dog and two cats.” The peer would respond appropriately and maybe ask the names of the pets. The adult coach would push Tate to answer questions and then reciprocate to the child who had done the asking. So Tate would be told to ask, “Do YOU have any pets?” It was amazing to see the difference in the typically developing children and Tate. The peers just knew how to respond and keep a conversation going, whereas Tate had to be told. The peers knew they should reciprocate with another question and keep the “ball bouncing” while Tate did not. Heavy prompts had to be used for Tate back then. After trying these very scripted types of things and Tate not making a whole lot of progress, it was determined that the lunchroom setting was pretty overwhelming for Tate. So, instead of the noisy lunchroom, they moved to a classroom or the library where it was quiet and Tate would be more comfortable. Tate never eats a school lunch and has taken the same lunch from home for seven long years (peanut butter sandwich-no jelly, chips and a couple of cookies.) The kids that wanted to participate in the lunch buddy program after that first year would bring a sack lunch and commit to being a lunch buddy for a week at a time. Usually there were two or three kids who would eat with Tate for a week. The kids’ questions and conversation starters were scripted with note cards beside them or even written on a placemat. The kids got so good at doing this that a lot of times the “cheat sheets” were not used. The students became therapist themselves and the teacher would often sit back amazed at how well the kids were doing. Conversation skills are not the only thing that is worked on during lunch. Posture and body language is also constantly targeted. Keeping Tate from stimming with his hands and fingers and just looking odd in general has been a huge part of the lunch buddy program.

These two boys are always good to Tate.
Because recess came right after lunch the program was carried over into the noon recess. The lunch buddies were asked to try to engage Tate in play at recess too. Tate often declined or tried to decline but his adult coach was right there encouraging him to participate in the peer activities.

For sixth grade Tate and his class moved to the junior high. The lunch buddy program continued. Tate and his lunch buddy group sat in the lunchroom that year, but at a table off to the side. It was still noisy and a bit overwhelming but doable. An adult was present every day but if the kids could keep the conversation going and Tate interacting the teacher was able to sit back and watch.

This year Tate is in seventh grade. Tate is sitting at the long tables with his peers three days a week with a teacher observing from a distance. If he becomes distressed or looks overwhelmed they go in and “rescue” the situation but the kids are always friendly and willing to help Tate too if they can. Two days a week the lunch buddies are back at the small table off to the side with a peer or two and a teacher. They are working on reciprocity and the coach is prompting Tate when necessary to ask APPROPRIATE questions and not just repeat the same question that was asked of him. (Read my blog post on reciprocity.) One day each week a Resource Room teacher is the adult at the table and one day a week the speech pathologist is the adult at the table.

Tate with two fantastic teachers, 6th grade
There are a lot of variables involved in a successful lunch buddy program. I have mentioned the education of the students so they understand the child’s disability as one of these variables. Another is very obvious. You must have students willing to participate. We were lucky. The kids LIKED being Tate’s teachers. It made them feel important. The staff involved often praised these kids and let them know what a difference they were making. When Tate was in grade school I occasionally took donuts to the kids who were participating in the program. Without the kids motivated to help there would have been no success. Another must, also an obvious one, is a staff that is excited about the program. If the staff had not jumped on board and made the lunch buddy program FUN and interesting then the peer models would NOT have been motivated to participate. Tate has been blessed with several rock-star teachers who love their jobs. Lastly, I had to be vested in the idea. I pushed and pushed and pushed some more for social skills teaching in every IEP meeting we had and followed up to make sure things were happening. Let me insert here. I have had good relationships with almost all of Tate’s teachers and Para-Professionals. Had we been using our energy to argue instead of using it to help Tate then the lunch buddy program would have probably failed.


One more disclaimer here: Tate still has autism. Tate’s social skills are still very poor compared to his peers. He still is not really keeping up his half of a friendship with these kids at all.  Tate has peers that are so good to him and so friendly but he does not have nearly as much interest in them as he should. He is sometimes even rude to them because of his poor social skills. We have seen VAST improvement though because of the lunch buddy program. I remember reading when Tate was newly diagnosed that it would take hundreds of repetitive trials to teach him the things that other children were just absorbing from their environment. Tate has had over nine hundred of these lunches with his peer models and adult coaches at this point. I am confident I can say that I would be living with a “different” Tate had he not had this program in place.

You might also like to read: A Friend is a Guy Who Likes You

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