Autism parents have a lot in common

My son Tate is fifteen. Tate has autism. He was about two and a half years old when he was diagnosed. Parenting a child with autism is challenging at times, but also very rewarding. We have had a lot of interesting experiences over the years and gotten to know a lot of others who are also a part of the autism community. So many of our stories and experiences are similar. I recently decided to illustrate some of the most common and repeated scenarios I have heard about from others in the autism community and/or experienced myself. They are in no particular order.

If you can relate let me know. I will be adding to these so tell me what kinds of things happen to you the most: annoying things, rewarding things, kindnesses shown, and the ways you’ve had to educate others. I would love to hear from you. Contact me on my Facebook Page called Quirks and Chaos. The comments are temporarily turned off here.

We are all in this together!  -Lisa

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Forks Can Be Dangerous and Other Tips From Tate

My fourteen-year-old son Tate was born with autism. In my last post I spoke of the evolution of autism in our home, how I used to feel about autism, and how I have come to terms with it. There was a time when I never would have believed I could easily laugh about our situation, but I do laugh now. A lot. Every single day. I do not necessarily laugh AT my son. I do not really laugh WITH my son either, as he does not usually understand why I find things funny. I laugh because I enjoy my son and I enjoy the funny things he says and does. Kids are funny, autism or not. I began illustrating some of our humorous moments so that others might also be able to smile, understanding that autism is not always doom and gloom.

Trying to see the world through Tate’s eyes is challenging at times, yet somewhat entertaining much of the time too. He has a unique perspective and often a surprising way of looking at things. Tate offers us advice and gives insight often. Here are some examples:

One of the biggest challenges we face, living with autism, is communication. There is miscommunication so much of the time. I can walk away from Tate, believing he understands the information or instructions given to him, when in fact he had no idea what was said. It’s not that he is not trying or does not care, although sometimes that may be the case. I believe he often “gets lost” in all the language and becomes overwhelmed trying to process it, so he tunes us out. And other times I am sure he fully heard but misunderstands. Regardless, we find ourselves in interesting conversations. Sometimes I feel like I’m in the old comedy routine, “Who’s on First.”

We work on communication and conversation skills constantly. Believe it to not, Tate has come a very long way. Tate sees small talk as a waste of time and really does not understand why anyone would want to talk about things he has no interest in himself.  

I received a question on my blog page from a little girl today. She asked me if having a kid with autism is as hard as everyone says. I told her that autism is hard, but it is mostly hard for Tate, not for me. I explained to her some of the challenges he faces now and some of the challenges I believe he will face in the future. But then I told her that being Tate's mom is not hard because I love him so much. He is a fun kid and we have a really good life with lots of laughter. Putting it into words easy enough for a child to understand may oversimplify it just a little but the bottom line is: Regardless of the struggles we face, Tate is my son and he means the world to me. 

If you liked these cartoon illustrations, you might like these posts as well: 

There is no ham in hamburgers.

Hobos, Goosebumps and Wiffle balls

Coffee Tables Aren't Hot

Coffee Tables Aren't Hot

When you hear the word “autism” where do your thoughts go? Does your mind start whirring through words or acronyms associated with an autism diagnosis? Do you think of: echolalia, stims, meltdowns, an IEP or SPD? Upon hearing the word “autism” a lot of us would picture a loved one and some of the stereotypic behaviors demonstrated by him or her. The word “autism” probably conjures up things in my mind that are not necessarily brought to your mind at all. I think of my son Tate and some of his unique quirks and stims. I think of his anxiety, his lack of social awareness and his literal way of thinking. In my mind, this is what autism looks like:

Social awareness and how to treat others is a daily theme. Tact is not easy to teach and when it has to be taught in each individual setting it becomes very challenging. I constantly remind myself that Tate is not intentionally rude. He genuinely does not understand what is socially acceptable and what is not in many situations. 

Then there's the literal way of thinking that is both endearing and at times maddening.

Tate keeps our home lively and interesting to say the least. A sense of humor is a must when teaching Tate. Laughter is a huge part of who we are. I've found the cartoons encourage and teach, as well as lighten the mood when autism tries to darken it. I hope you enjoy them as much as we do. Tate likes seeing himself as the star of the show in these illustrations. If you'd like to see more then visit our Facebook page Quirks and Chaos. 

Click here for another blog post showcasing Tate and his literal way of thinking: There is no ham in hamburgers