Once
in a while, my quiet boy with autism disappears for a little while and a
chatterbox takes his place. It is usually when he is very excited about
something. When we went to pick out our Xmas tree this past December, Tate
talked more than I had ever heard before and it lasted for hours. We have
repeatedly noticed when Tate runs a fever he turns into a motor mouth
too. Tate was very eager because we were going to see “Pirates, Band of
Misfits” at the theater. He told anyone who would listen about his plans to see
the movie after school. He told most people more than once I think.
Tate, third grade |
On
the way to school this morning Tate pointed down the road, in the opposite way
we were turning, and said, “So, what is down that road, the zoo and the camera
store?” Of all the things he could ask me about he picked “the zoo and the camera
store.” It cracked me up. I told him that we could get to either a
zoo or a store to buy a camera, by going in the direction he pointed. Questions
beginning with where, what, why, when, or how, are a big deal around here. Most
toddlers ask “why” dozens of times a day, and wear their parents out with
questions. Tate did not. Now, he does occasionally ask questions. When
he does, it takes me by surprise because I seldom hear him do it. The autism is
never more “real” to me than when Tate does the things that he should have been
doing all along. It is like: I don’t know what I am missing until I have
it and then lose it again. When Tate becomes a chatterbox for a few
hours, or even a few minutes, it just reinforces for me, all the things he (and
I) missed out on.
Tate
was pretty talkative this morning at school. They had a “fun day” today
and there were stations with activities outside and in. Tate initiated a
conversation with one of the parent-volunteers, which is a pretty big
step. He asked her, “So, did you go to college?” She said she had and then
Tate asked her another question about college. It was not the most appropriate
thing he could have started a conversation with. It was pretty random, but
I’ll take it. We have been working hard and practicing conversation skills
with lots of coaching, and it is paying off. Tate’s team at school has
been coaching him and they practice with staff members every day. They
have spent time talking with Tate about appropriate questions to ask and
“weird” questions people would not ask each other. This all has to be
taught because Tate will not pick it up from his environment like his peers
have.
We
were standing in line to buy our movie tickets this afternoon when twin boys, a
little younger than Tate, came in with a young lady, probably a sitter. The
boys both had autism and caused quite a ruckus while waiting in line. It was
very tough for the adult to buy tickets and keep the boys both with her. They
were everywhere at once, touching anything they could reach. I did not pity the
boys or the caregiver but I did admire the caregiver for bringing the boys to
the theater. Watching those boys reinforced for me how blessed I am. Tate
has so many skills that many with autism do not. I have three boys and
three girls that do NOT have autism. I can only imagine how much more
challenging things would be for me if two of my children had autism. The
Center for Disease Control released a new statistic last month: 1 in 88
children have autism now and it is 1 in 54 for boys. If autism does not
directly affect you now, it is probably just a matter of time. It is important
to educate yourself about autism, more than ever before.
Another post you might like to read: A Sack of Potatoes
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Thanks for sharing, Lisa! I know that others will find comfort and solace in your adventures with Tate and Sidney. Maybe they will learn something too and that is the most valuable thing of all!
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ReplyDeleteI am so new at this blogging that I can hardly get a comment posted. ha. My first attempt failed.
DeleteI wanted to say Thanks Alison for the encouraging words. I do hope people learn from the blog. I hope they can also laugh WITH me some.